Abject Hopelessness, without Pride or Dignity

 My hopelessness is abject.  

We are a nation completely devoid of pride or dignity.


Things I have learned: 

I am not certain who to trust. 

Maybe I will just trust myself! 

I am not alone!

I am a loving, kind, empathetic person!

The World is struggling right now!


Things I have discovered:

Although I am sure they are a varied group of people in terms of characteristics, some people on this Earth, family members, enablers, sycophants and megaphones, all have a few things in common.


1.The intention from the beginning was to destroy USA for various reasons. 

I now know what those people in NAZI Germany felt like who helplessly watched Hitler’s rise and even spoke using their voice to object.


2. I discovered yesterday I am pitied and seem weak to them.  I went a house flying the White Supremacist flag, hoping to educate them about the dangers of their beliefs,  When I said I was afraid for our Nation and our People, the couple felt pity for me and said "We will protect you."  I told them I did not need their protection me, but thanks. They did not understand. 


3. Some people are determined enough to start a war to stay in power forever.  It is not an issue of being brainwashed, ignorant or uninformed, but sadistic intention, which is why they do not want us bothering them with the facts.  The reality is, they know they live in an alternate reality, but they prefer it that way.


4.Some of the reasons some people seem to feel entitled to do what they are doing despite the fact many people are being harmed are:  Religion, the perversion of Christianity; Small government (only things that serve them are allowed); Collection of mass amounts of money for protection.


5.The bad actors are all in this together, like feathers of a bird.  They know exactly what is happening, anyone still a supporter of the nationalist movement have knowledge of exactly what is going on and they will not rest until they are in power forever.  Oppression is their goal.


6.They have already made up their mind.  To them, people who do not share their beliefs are to be pitied, murdered, or disenfranchised. They know they are stealing and they do not care.  


7.They say they love us. I do not feel the love.  It is so insulting to experience a group of people who treat you as if you are an idiot when you know for sure from their behavior, words, and relationships they are cult followers.  It is disconcerting, destabilizing, depersonalizing. 


Decisions I have made:

1. I will only vote public servants into office who have proven themselves not to hold bigoted, racist, white supremacist beliefs.

My youngest niece, Sarah told me when she demanded I stop sending her emails four years ago that if I did not like “their President” I should move to another country. 


I do not know where I would go at this point. It seems like the predators are everywhere in power.  I investigated New Zealand, but the billionaires have moved there to escape climate change. I do not want to near anyone who has contributed to this fiasco.


Maybe she is correct. I am not certain how much fight I have left in me now.  At least I have my highly mortgaged house protected by cameras and sharp fences. 


My hopelessness is abject.  

We are a nation completely without pride or dignity.


I must overcome this feeling on a regular basis.  It seems most people are trying to live their lives as if nothing is happening.  I cannot do that.  I do not know why.


I cleanse myself of my rage and hatred every day by burning it off with my Yoga practice.


Each day I renew my faith and hope.  If Viktor Frankl can do this in a concentration camp in Nazi Germany (he lost everything to the Nazi's) then I can do this each day too for I am no different than him.  I can change my mind.


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